We now return you to your regularly scheduled feature – Hump Day Miscellany. I missed it last week (like you even noticed!), an oversight I did not want to repeat.
1). Word to Amanda Beard – EW! – Apparently there were rumors that she and Michael Phelps were dating. He simply and graciously denied them. She went on some cheesy radio show and offered the following:
“Ew, no!” Held hands? “Ew, no! Not even that.” Even the mere suggestion that Michael might be attracted to her inspired an “ew-that’s-so-nasty” response…..”C’mon, I have really good taste,” she told the radio hosts. “He’s not really my type, personally.” Laughing, she added, “I go for a little bit different-looking guys.”
Oh sure honey – you have great taste. You’re the one who has posed in her b-day suit in Playboy so that really ugly, fat, dirty men can gaze at your gorgeous bod while they polish the bishop. Classy! I guess really nice guys with more money than God and a zillion times your level of sophistication are just so not right for you. You just go right ahead pimping yourself out to girlie mags and low brow radio shows. I’m pretty sure Michael will be too busy with his millions of dollars worth of commercial endorsements to take you out on a date, anyhow.
2). Every week when I go to roll the garbage can out to the curb I open it to see if there’s any room (a habit of years) only to notice there is 1 bag of garbage in there. 1 bag. I’d like to feel really good about that but frankly it seems sort of pathetic and lonely.
Am I green or blue? Hard to say.
3). Some people have issues with cookies and will eat the entire pack. For some it is candy – if there’s a bag of any size in the house it becomes 1 serving = 1 bag. For me it is cereal. I have to stay away from the stuff because once I have a bowl of cereal I am so mesmerized by its sweet, crunchy goodness that I want another.. and another… and then more. Even when my stomach hurts from eating it I have to actively refrain from filling up the bowl again. The solution is to just not buy any at all but Pookie is home so there it is and there I was – chomp, chomp, chomp. *oink*
4). I had a weird triathlon dream last night. The swim was finishing up in a dough boy pool where you swam ’round and ’round and ’round and when you got out you had to run into the woods to start the bike. I was confused about which way to go and I couldn’t remember where my stuff was. I finally decided that I left it by my bike instead of in the car and when I found my bike (in the woods) I got in trouble for changing to my bike things there. Pre-race anxiety dreams are so amusing, aren’t they?
5). Tell me this. If you had a neighbor who went back to work 3 days after she had a special needs baby and then you learned 4 months later that her teen aged daughter was knocked up would think about what a great mother she is? Really. Just pretend you heard about someone in town who fit that description. What thoughts would pop into your head? Okay – forget I asked but give it a whirl internally. Be honest with yourself.